Posted by Greg Rediske on Jun 01, 2018
The 5th to the last meeting of the Daniels Regime began on time more or less, 12:29, and with a slightly different opening. To everyone's surprise, Don got close to the microphone and sang loud and clear, doing his very best Frank Sinatra imitation:
 
"And now the end is near, and so I face the final curtain.  
My Rotary friends, I'll say it clear, I'll state my case of which I'm certain.
I've lived a Rotary president's life that's full, I've travelled each and evr'y Lakewood Rotary highway.
And more, much more than this, I did it my way."
 
Oh, wait. That was just my imagination, running away with me. As you all know, Don can't sing.
 
But anyway, non-singing Don thanked his minions, including Eric Warn greeting folks, Jim Weinand strong arming for Paul Harris ($1579!!), Jan Gee selling tickets, Bob Hammar selling t-shirts and stuff, Duncan/Bob/Rob doing setup, Eric Quinn taking pictures, Clint Johnson giving the invocation, and the dearly-departed-to-Olympia Tom Crabill led us in the pledge. There were no visiting Rotarians. John Forkenbrock delivered the Sunshine Report, which omitted a report on himself, now using a walker, but did include information on Ron Irwin's appendix removal, Paula Olson's knee surgery, and notification that Ron Adkins' memorial would be announced later. Ron was a Rotarian since 1996.
 
And for your information: the club recently received a deposit of $25.86 for the first quarter of 2018 from the Amazon Smile program. That translates to over $100/year for doing nothing more than buying stuff! Please make all purchases at Amazon through this program!
 
Today is National "Tell A Pun" Day!
My wife left me because of my gambling. All I can think about is winning her back.
Never date a tennis player. Love means nothing to them.
A man tried to sell me a coffin today. I told him, "That's the last thing I need."
 
Announcements:
1.         Sally Porter Smith announced the final-final finishing of the food project. There were 10 or so Rotarians/Partners last week at EFN, but we got not-quite half way. WE NEED YOU! June 12 at EFN, 9 to 3 (9-12, 12-3, or the whole shebang). Please communicate with Sally that you can come. (sallypor789@msn.com)
2.         Friday, July 6 will be the installation of our new officers at the regular Rotary meeting. Following at 4 will be a picnic at the home of the proud parents (Rick and Sharon) of our new president, Gayle Selden.  "Fairburgers" with or without onions and other stuff, along with wine and beer: only $10! Get your check or cash to John Lowney. 35 signed up as of today.
3.         Eric Quinn: We're losing Gayle as a writer to the presidency, and losing John Magnuson to Edmonds. We could use another writer of bulletins. As you can see from this example right here, talent is not an issue. You just need to have a sincere desire to ridicule the sitting president at every opportunity. Call Eric!
4.         Gordy Quick announced a new member of the Curmudgeon Club: John Warner turned 90! John has been in Lakewood Rotary since 1972, and he claims (with some exaggeration I suspect) that Rotary is why he's still kicking. And the Happy Birthday song was delivered with gusto by all attending.
5.         Rob Erb: Don't forget June 16, 9 am at the Pavilion: landscaping by Lakewood Rotary. If you are ambulatory, you should be there. Please.
6.         Jim Bisceglia, whose last name President Don thankfully didn't attempt this time, asked that the president, or someone, announce the next week's program. Which in this case is Charlie Gray, talking about housing for veterans.
 
                               
 
And it was here that the President acted like it was part of the routine to wait until this point in the program to ask for guests of Rotarians. No one fell for it. They were: Sharon Rediske, beautiful wife of Greg and copy editor of this particular bulletin; Vitorio, owner of Johnny Walker's fitness company; Carole, wife of the esteemed Ted Wier; and Fae, wife of the man who led us in the pledge. Look it up.
 
More Puns:
I was kidnapped by a gang of mimes. They did unspeakable things to me.
My first job was at an orange juice factory, but I got canned. Couldn't concentrate.
I went to the doctor with hearing problems. My doctor asked if I could describe the symptoms. I said, "Sure. Homer is fat, Marge has blue hair, and Bart is a pain in the neck."
 
The Anne Enquist Minute:
Don refused to allow Anne to speak when she was inducted last week, but popular demand forced his hand, and Anne told us all that she was born in Roswell, New Mexico and attended New Mexico State, where she met the suave and debonair Steve. She taught high school English, before going to grad school at the UW, then teaching at Ft. Steilacoom CC and TCC, before becoming a professor at UPS. Soon thereafter she was asked to teach writing skills in the law school, and 36 years later she retired. Tops on her list: Grandchildren, travel, reading, and now Rotary. Probably, the suave and debonair one is in there some place, too. (And she is a very active member of the Board of Directors of the Lakewood Community Foundation Fund. Stay tuned for our new campaign to reach $1 million, which Anne is spearheading.               
 
The Steve Enquist Minute:
Tom Crabill was awarded his third Paul Harris, and Rose Stevens received her 7th. Nice job!!
 
                 
 
The Pavilion:
Dave Coleman took over the meeting for a while, letting us know that the Pavilion looks to be completed in 40 days, and open for business in 44 days for Summerfest. Weekly construction meetings take place there every Thursday at 9 am, if you are interested. After the Auction, we needed $47K. If we sell 350 more bricks at $100, that is $35K. And we just received $15K from the Ben Cheney Foundation. Bricks will be installed in October. NEEDED:  Someone to enter all the brick information into a computer. Call Dave, please!!!!
MONDAY JUNE 4: Ward Fletcher needs help moving the siding. 9 am at the maintenance shed by the Pavilion.
 
 
I started a business building yachts in my home. Sails are going thru the roof.
A duck walks into a pharmacy to buy some chapstick. The clerk says, "Will this be cash or charge?" The duck says, "Just put it on my bill."           
 
Community Concerns Committee:
Jay Mayer received a unanimous approval by the club for a Lakewood Rotary grant to the Family Renewal Shelter for $2000.
 
Housing for International Students:
Sally Porter Smith introduced Ashley Chambers from Pierce College, whose job is to help find housing for international students at Pierce and in the Clover Park School District. This is a great opportunity to create a "bridge between cultures".  Interestingly, each student represents $40,000 into the local economy as well. Contact Sally: sallypor789@msn.com.
 
As Columbo would say, "And just one more thing.....:
Joe Quinn proclaimed for all the world to know how important the Partners in Lakewood Rotary are to us, and this thanks will be formalized on June 15 at the meeting. Lots of Partners will be there to be recognized.
 
Citations, aka Fines:
--Bud Montgomery returned from the now scorching Green Valley, AZ ("It's cold here! We have to sleep with a blanket!"). He delivered a check and a handmade bowl with a dime in it, to be used by the soon-to-be ex-president at Monday Night Football.
--Mark Edgecomb: Daughter Jessica is now Dr. Jessica, via med school in New York.  $$$
--Rick Selden: Granddaughter in Florida graduated Summa Cum Laude from high school, and grandson Maxwell is on to high school (9th grade), $100. Their auntie (Gayle) continued to gush about them and promised her own $100.
 
Program:
Charlene Miseli was asked to gather information on our speaker so she could introduce him properly, and she took that charge further than most: she slept with him last night in order to get the very best information. What she got was: Colonel Jason Miseli is from San Francisco, graduated from West Point in 1995 as an armor officer. He is currently the brigade commander at JBLM for the Stryker Brigade. He has also been a professor at the US Military Academy, has an 18-year-old son who just graduated from high school, and a freshman daughter at Harrison Prep, both of whom he shares with the Rotarian who did the introduction. Last and far from least: he is soon to be the newest Partner in Lakewood Rotary. He has faced some significant challenges in his Army life, but this.....
 
                    
 
Above: Presenter, Colonel Jason Miseli (also a Brigade Commander)
 
The motto of the Colonel's Lancer Combat Team is "Seize the high ground." Their job is to quickly move their brigade to the desired location, and hold that location. There are 56 brigade combat teams in the US Army, 3 at JBLM. There are three types of brigades: Armor, Stryker, and Infantry. Jason's brigade has approximately 300 Strykers (10 different types), and 4500 soldiers. Drones are used but only for reconnaissance.  He noted that JBLM is the second largest employer in Washington State (after Boeing), with 55,000 "employees", and it generates $7.8 Billion per year into the economy. They pride themselves on community participation, and he submitted a "support request form" for that very purpose. 
Terrific program. It is indeed exciting to have these two in the Lakewood Rotary orbit.
 
             
 
 Above: Can you figure out which Rotarian this is?
 
Drawing:
Bob Lordahl had #1716, but got a measly $5.00, instead of $375. Which is, in fact, better than nothing.
 
A Spanish magician has a grand magical show and at the end he says he will disappear after counting to three. He starts to count, “Uno, dos…”
Kazaam! He vanished without a tres.
 
Finally: the presentation on Friday, June 8 will be from Charlie Gray, the Executive Director of Housing Vouchers for Veterans

 
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