Posted by Greg Rediske on Sep 13, 2019
 
Some time during the Middle Ages, which as everyone knows was in the 5th to the 15th centuries, someone somewhere noted that Judas Iscariot was the 13th to arrive at dinner with Jesus on a Friday, and Friday the 13th became associated with bad luck, and some would say bad movies. On this Friday the 13th at Lakewood Rotary, President Potter reminded us all with his walk-up music, Stevie Wonder’s “Superstition”. Which includes the line “Everybody scream!”. But nobody did.
 
 
 
And so it began, and continued with Jim Weinand leading us in the pledge to the flag, followed by Bob Hammar reading the inspiration for the day. President Bill proceeded to thank his helpers but screwed it all up. Tsk, tsk. He neglected to notice that Leanna Albrecht was greeting folks, in lieu of her boss, Ron Banner. Also helping were Chuck Hellar, Gary Barton and finally Leanna Christian selling tickets, and Kendra Riconosciuto collected $224 at the Paul Harris table. The setup crew did their thing once again, flawlessly, while Phil Eng donned the camera for the day.
 
 
 
Rotarian visitors: Jay B (sorry about not getting the name) from Tacoma 8, Marnee Obendorf from South Puget Sound (Shelton), Georgia Lomax from Sumner Rotary. No guests of Rotarians, but Colonel Covey was in the house! No new Sunshine to report, said John Forkenbrock.
 
Announcements:
--Andrew Neiditz reminded all of the dedication of the new John Wahlstrom Center for Advanced Manufacturing building dedication on Friday, September 20, 3:30 pm.
--Hurricane Dorian relief, through District 5020. A Lakewood Rotarian will match a donation dollar for dollar in excess of $1000 from the Club. $749 was raised Friday, with $100 more committed. Only need $151 more dollars to hit the match, and donate $2000.
--Gayle Selden: Tacoma South’s annual fundraiser, putt-putt golf at Harkness Furniture, October 25, 5 pm tee off, 7 pm dinner. $75 each.
--Steve Mazoff: Reeder Roadster Romp to Leavenworth was a great success, thanks in large part to the organizational skills of Phil Eng. Over 30 people went, including Bob and Mary Hammar’s daughter Taryn, who managed their wheelchairs and walkers while helping carry Bob’s large purchase of wine from the winery. We were also regaled there by songwriter/singer Chris Kimball and guitarist John Magnuson (helped by the human music stand, Bonnie Magnuson) in a glorious new hit song, “Those CPAP Blues”. Hilarious.
 
 
I used to snore so loudly, it even shook the bed,
The racket filled the bedroom, enough to wake the dead.
Now I'm sleeping soundly, thanks to all that forced air,
But all those straps and velcro are messing up my hair.
(Verse 3 above. Reprinted without any permission whatsoever.)
 
--Followed by President Potter’s latest attempt at humor. I shall summarize and keep it short in order to protect my dear readers: Farmer Smith’s worker, Zeke, had to break the news that the Farmer’s dog had died. How? Ate too much burned horse meat. Because of the barn fire. Which started because of the house fire. Which began when candles caught the curtains on fire. The candles were lit to highlight the coffin. The coffin?!? Oh, yeah, your wife died. And they all booed.
 
--Greg Horn: By 2017, there were only 22 new cases of polio. But now: up to 78; 16 in Afghanistan and 62 in Pakistan. More work to do. There is a new group at District, called Polio Plus Society of District 5020. Give $100/year to the Foundation and automatically become a member.
--CPR instruction: only 2 spots left!
--Board meeting is not on the 19th, but the 26th. And not at the Country Club, but at the Black Bear Diner, next to the Great American Casino, formerly Codys, formerly the Purple Rhino.
--Bud Montgomery: carry your cell phone with you! A cousin of Bud’s did not, and consequently spent 4-1/2 hours lying on the ground from a stroke, with the repercussions that such a thing entails.
--Bob Zawilski: Grant training, next Saturday. Contact Bob.
--Weddings and Anniversaries: Sam and Sybil Hunter led in wedding length: 62 years. Gary Fulton and Walt Richardson are both 35 year members of Lakewood Rotary. Marnee from Shelton took over from Horn at this point, and highlighted the birthday folks. Ward Fletcher gave about $1.14/year for his birthday (88!!), while pointing out that he doesn’t dance and knows no dances. Greg Rediske was forced to sing a song from the 1960s, and warbled hopelessly the chorus of “I Want To Hold Your Hand”. Bob Z cited Abba as his favorite group from the 1960s, although they didn’t form until 1972. Gayle Selden’s first car was an ugly Chevy of some type, which helped her along by surviving two crashes. Mary Strom Copland was asked to represent something about Richard Nixon, and held up two spread-finger “V” signs. Perfect.
--Gary Fulton presented Jay Mayer with his 4th Paul Harris, and noted that Jay’s retirement party from Heritage Bank will be October 4. Join him!
 
 
Program:
Andrew Neiditz introduced Georgia Lomax, Executive Director of the Pierce County Library System since 2014. The recent levy success has allowed the library to have guaranteed funding for operations for 5 to possibly 10 years. Now the question: should they build new facilities in Lakewood and Tillicum? Her presentation was called “Imagine your new Lakewood libraries”, and featured a survey of Lakewood Rotarians using their cell phones, in real time displaying the results on the screen. Interesting. Georgia pointed out that technology has changed how libraries work, which has resulted in the need to constantly expand their services. The Lakewood Library was built in 1963: lots of changes (266,000 visitors last year). Tillicum’s library is only 2100 square feet (40,000 visitors last year). In addition to surveying the community’s desires regarding possible new buildings, a funding study is also underway. In the question and answer period, George reported that anyone can set up a one on one with a librarian for personal instruction on whatever it is you need help on.
 
 
Above: Presenter, Georgia Lomax
 
The Drawing:  Ivan’s brother, Ron Irwin, won the right to take home $5.00. Better luck next time.
 
By popular demand (meaning someone might have said they possibly could be interested in seeing it if there was absolutely nothing else to do), here is the link to the infamous song performance by Ole Magnuson and his Sidekick last week. Cinematography by Philip Eng.
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2NfJJAwhHQQ&t=6s (if clicking this doesn’t work, copy and paste to your browser)
 
Also, for those of you who got frustrated by the long line afterwards and weren’t able to get Ole’s autograph and a selfie: can’t help with the selfie, but I have his address. Please send a self-addressed stamped envelope, and he’ll be sure and get you his autograph back to you. Address it to: The Guitar Hero c/o John Magnuson, PO Box 66, Edmonds, WA  98020
 
The adulation for Ole is well placed. He has been immortalized in songs about him. Not only that, but Spanish bullfighters have long sung his praises when fighting the bulls with their red cape, changing the pronunciation only slightly. So here is one of those immortalizing songs, sung to the tune of “The Ballad of Davy Crockett”. Uh one, anna two, anna……
 
Born on the mean streets of Edmonds, WA-h
The one and only son of his mom and his pa
Learned to like lutefisk when he was only three
Now there's nothing left of his olfactory
Ole, Ole Magnuson, a Swede down in Washington
 
When he started high school he was twenty two
You see there was much that he barely knew
The counselor said to Ole, you're taking home ec
And that's where he discovered the opposite sex
Ole, Ole Magnuson, look out he's discovered girls
 
So one thing led to another as the years went by
He caught Lena's eye and he said with a sigh
"Lena, dear, won't you be my Swedish honey?"
She said: "Swedish boys and being sexy is a dichotomy"
Ole, Ole Magnuson, a frustrated Swede was he
 
By the time he started college he was quite a big guy
He even had a crew cut that could poke out your eye
When it came to dating this Swede was a neophyte
But he could row that Husky boat clean out of sight!
Ole, Ole Magnuson, a champion oarsman by golly
 
Now comes the story that you're longing to hear
Just how did he make Bonnie overcome her fear?
Why would she date a lutefisk-loving Swede?
When there were Norwegians: Swedes just can't compete!
Ole, Ole Magnuson, trying hard to impress the girl
 
It's hard to imagine what went thru her mind
Could be she just worked so very hard to be kind
I think it might be that she loved his dog
Or else all that flying put her mind in a fog
Ole, Ole Magnuson, a lucky Swede was he
 
It's a long way from Edmonds for this man called Ole
Despite his Swedish heritage, he's not all that sorry
He makes us laugh at jokes that are kinda/sorta funny
But the best thing he ever did was he married Bonnie!
Ole, Ole Magnuson, a Swede down in Washington.
 
 
OK, OK. We’ve heard the clamoring. Without Ole to write the bulletin, people are having trouble trying to go “cold turkey” in quitting his jokes. Funny: “cold turkey” is often how his jokes are received, too. But anyway, here’s the latest from Edmonds, WA:
 
Longtime Stavangerfjord Norway Rotary Club member Sven Svenssen died. Now hit vasn’t a happy occasion on accounta cuz his vidow Hulda hadda dispose of Sven’s belongings. Hulda ain’t da sentimental type though an she vent down to da Stavangerfjord Suburban Times to put Sven’s obituary inna paper. Vhen da dang Editor guy offered his condolences an asked vhut she vanted to say, she yust shrugged her shoulders an said, “Yust put in ‘Sven died.’” Well da Editor guy named Benni said it might be appropriate to say a little more and dat he vould give her da first five words for free.  Hulda thought about it fer a moment an said, “Okey dokey, put in ‘Sven died, boat for sale.’”
 
And finally, read this bulletin and tell Greg Rediske so you can get a make-up for a missed meeting; also, if you shop online, please do so at Amazon Smile so a portion of your purchase can be allocated to Lakewood Rotary.
 
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