Posted by Greg Rediske on Jan 05, 2018
It was recently discovered that the only men who claim to not understand women are the young, the old, and middle-aged.
And while it's true that this has nothing to do with the Rotary bulletin report for the meeting of January 5, 2018, it is hoped that the presence of such (possible) mirth will fool you into reading the rest of this thing. There's good stuff! Stay with it! Don't fall asleep!
So it all started in a circular building on the campus of the Clover Park Technical College with the heartfelt thanks from our president, Don Daniels, for the kind treatment he received at the Presidential Roast in December. He was so thankful in fact that he fined all the Puffins associated with the event. Few were in attendance, however: probably for fear of such retaliation. With that lingering bitterness safely retired, DD thanked Bob Hammar, Ward Fletcher, Duncan Cook, and Mary Horn for the setup. (By the way: if you like seeing your name in the bulletin, it is highly recommended that you pursue the presidency, or meeting setup. Either way, you get a lot of press.) Special thanks to Mary and Greg Horn for arranging the box lunches! Several years ago, they volunteered to provide the lunch for the first meeting in January, and the reward for their kindness is the perennial duty of same. Also on the thank-you list that Don compiled were Chuck Hellar for doing the drawing tickets, Bob Hammar for collecting lunch money by virtue of his honesty and ability to make change adequately, Gary Fulton and Mary Marlin on the Paul Harris desk ($540), Eric Quinn took photos, John Lowney served as Sgt at Arms (his first attempt at this position, after months of painstaking tutelage from Tom Crabill), and Scott Buser started the meeting with the invocation, while Ed Shannon led us in the pledge to the flag. (Not a bad example of a run-on sentence.....)
Visiting Rotarians: Jesus and Carlos from Puerto Rico made the trip to the Country Club first, and then arrived to do a flag exchange, and gave cool mugs to President Don and President-elect Gayle.  Also visiting was Clover Park Technical College President and Past President of Clover Park Rotary, Joyce Loveday.
Sunshine Report: Former Lakewood Rotarian (2009-2014) and past president of the Clover Park Technical College, John Walstrom, recently passed away at the age of 74. He got a cancer diagnosis about 6 months ago. The service will be January 20 out of state (Maryland?), and cards can be sent to the college. Andrew Neiditz spoke to what a wonderful human being, and great asset for Lakewood and the college, that John was. A man to be missed.
New Rotary Vision Statement: "Together, we see a world where people unite and take action to create lasting change — across the globe, in our communities, and in ourselves."
Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

A side note: Peter Marsh likes cookies.
--Mo Sarram said that the deadline for applications for the World Affairs Seminar (June 23-29) is January 20. Open to family and friends of Rotarians! Ages 16-18.
--There's a new E-Club in town. District 5020 town, anyway. Mary and Greg Horn "attended" the inaugural meeting (online) recently. They have 30 members already, and 16 waiting, with members from around the world.
--Clayton DeNault: The YMCA is celebrating their 25th anniversary on Sunday, January 28, 6-8 pm. Business casual, alcohol to be served. RSVP to Clayton ( Lakewood Rotary seeded the Lakewood Y those many years ago with $100,000. We should be there to celebrate!
--This wasn't announced, but I will announce it now: If you don't normally read your monthly ROTARIAN magazine, I encourage you to check out the new one, "What's it's like.....Ordinary Rotarians, Extraordinary Tales." There's  some very interesting and entertaining "short stories" about Rotarians and their adventures. Including one about growing space tomatoes.
Educator of the Month:
Kim Prentice introduced Park Lodge Elementary principal Synette Melluzo, who recommended TJ Serrianne for this Lakewood Rotary honor. TJ is a fourth grade teacher at Park Lodge, who volunteers for anything and everything that needs doing at the school. He became National Board Certified in 2016, and he coaches lacrosse. TJ couldn't be there because of a conflict, but Synette read his note of thanks and appreciation. Congratulations, TJ!
My wife just opened the door for me. 
Would have been a nice gesture had the car not been going 70 mph at the time.
Above: President Don with Synette Melluzo
Citations: Dictionary definition-- "any award or commendation, as for outstanding service, hard work, or devotion to duty, especially a formal letter or statement recounting a person's achievements."  An alternate definition is "a summons, especially to appear in court." The latter seems closer to the truth in this case....
Steve Enquist: Just returned from grandkid sitting (3 and 6 years old), turned 70, leaving for Australia on Friday, 1/12: $100 to the Paul Harris Foundation.
Andrew Neiditz: $25 in recognition of the great life works of John Walstrom.
Eric Quinn: He came prepared to pay his IOU fine of $51, but forgot about the $15 cash needed for lunch. He was hungry. After pulling out my calculator and checking three times, he paid $36, and still owes $15.
Remember: when a woman says, "What?", she's not saying she didn't hear you.  She's just giving you a second chance to change what you just said.
Andrew Neiditz introduced Pierce County's sheriff of 17 years, Paul Pastor. Paul was born in Virginia (father was in the Navy), but has lived in Lakewood for many years. He earned a PhD from Yale, and instructs at the FBI Academy. He leads 240 deputies in the 1800 square miles that is Pierce County, in addition to another 400 or so employees. Pierce County residents pay $140/year in taxes for the sheriff's department. He also noted that this is not even close to being a sleepy backwater. They have tried to make property crime as much of a priority as they can (108 in jail recently), and have started a phlebotomy  program modeled after Lakewood's (4 trained officers currently).They have an elderly fraud team in place. Meth labs and gangs were beaten back, but the gangs are making a rebound. Paul preached more inter-governmental cooperation: do we need 3 SWAT teams in the area? How about sharing equipment more? As regards the tarnished image of law enforcement lately (racially charged), he said that racism is a species disease. Law enforcement is doing more than most to address the issue, and he noted that trust is a two way street. He feels that I-940 has significant problems (indicting police officers more aggressively). There is not enough being done for ID theft, and cooperation between agencies would help. The D.A.R.E. program was good for cops/kids relations, but not effective in its anti-drug message (in terms of results). The Amtrak disaster showed "fantastic" agency cooperation. There were some problems with communication, in that the NTSB was charged with talking to the press, but they weren't going to be there for 24 hours. So Paul had Ed Troyer ("on speed dial with all the major networks") handle the press and pass along needed information.
And there was more information than that even! Including a statement from his "Sheriff's Log" where he noted the ugly rhetoric in society today. He said we need to emulate the civil and peaceful discourse evidenced by Dr. Martin Luther King, who maintained dignity and respect, occupying the moral high ground while "using the power of civility against his opponents."  Paul wrote, "If we are to strengthen America, we need to do a top-to-bottom status check to upgrade our national character and temperament. America will only achieve its full potential if we decide to raise the moral bar for public engagement and bring the best qualities of who we are to the public arena."
I should point out, too, that Sheriff Paul singled out Scott Buser with the statement that "you're a lot younger than I am, so...." Actually, all that umpiring agrees with Scott. You're both 65 years old, Paul....
The Drawing: Rick Selden AGAIN won the opportunity to choose a chip, but pulled white. I think Rick has won 49.33% of all drawings so far this year, if my math is holding up.
Finally, a special note from Judy Hosea:
"Finally!  After 27 days of doom and gloom weather-wise, in Port it was sunny and clear!  Of course....we leave in 4 days!  We decided to take advantage of our newly found good luck and take a drive to see a little of Corpus Christi...across the bay, since we are lodged on the outer bank “Mustang Island.”  South of us are North and South Padre Islands, together with Mustang, protecting most of the central and southern Gulf Coast of Texas.  It is funny to see palm trees, cactus and beach all together.....oh, and signs everywhere warning of all the South Texas snakes!

Tom is still lame and has been going to physical therapy with questionable results.  Monk and I are finding our own amusements....mostly beach and people in the wonderful Gulf Waters RV Resort....look it up, it is a great spot!
Down the road from our beachfront park about 3 miles, is the devastated town of Port Aransas.  It really got hammered by Hurricane Harvey!  The quintessential beach hamlet is in tatters.  There is a huge effort afoot to get a semblance of the cute touristy beach town back for the spring break rush.  After a month of watching dubious progress, I have to think it is going to be longer than that.  Port Aransas is just across a narrow shipping channel from Aransas Park and Rockport, where Harvey’s center landed.  A drive through there last week was nothing short of apocalyptic.  I don’t exaggerate when I tell you that we drove on a divided freeway for over five miles...where they used the center available land, to stack mountains of debris collected.  The piles were 20-50’ high and stretched the distance.  Peoples’ homes, livelihoods and dreams, reduced to a gigantic landfill.  So tragic!   Local news is always about the argument with FEMA and insurance settlements.  Little victories in the small towns keep the people’s spirits up!

We will depart on Friday heading east.....through more of Harvey’s path toward Houston and finally into Louisiana.  It will take us a week, finding a fish camp in the swamps to settle in until our January 21st target of New Orleans.  I will send some more news along the way."
And that concludes Judy's update and this bulletin, with one exception...
Little Ole, 8 years old and a Swede, was sitting at the kitchen table doing his school homework. He had a puzzled look on his face as he considered the assignment that was due - writing an essay about his origin. He turned to question his mother. "Mama, vere did Grandma come from?" he asked. "Da stork brought her," answered mama Lena. "And vere did yew come from?" asked Little Ole. "Da stork brought me," his mother answered. "And vere did I come from?" Little Ole inquired. "Vell, son, da stork brought yew, tew," mama Lena replied. With a scowl on his face, Little Ole picked up his pencil, turned to his school tablet, and began writing his essay: "Dere have been no natural births in our family for three yenerations."
And finally: As the late economist Ezra Solomon once remarked, “The only function of economic forecasting is to make astrology look respectable.”